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Thursday, September 12, 2019

Exhibition Day

I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word. - Martin Luther King, Jr.


Wednesday, July 24, 2019


One of my trusted sources got the document to me... I mean, it's filed in court, so it's public information no matter what. It's the Medical Examiner's official Answer to our Supreme Court appeal. Keep in mind that it has been FOUR YEARS now that we have been asking Joyce deJong to change the Cause of Death on my nephew Charlie's Death Certificate from Suicide to, well, not Suicide.

Why? Because he didn't commit suicide. He died of tragic and fateful circumstances, which are very different from the Three Suicide Circumstances listed in deJong's official report in Kalamazoo County Case No. W15-470. Those Three Suicide Circumstances were all disavowed by deJong herself after meeting with the attorney helping my sister, an old family friend, who is as astonished as everyone else is by the M.E.'s callous stubbornness.

She said a close friend or family member had committed suicide. That did not happen, and she admitted so in writing. She said Charlie had been upset immediately prior to his death. That was not true, and she admitted so in writing. She said he had "other relationship problems" - which is an airy statement all by itself, and she admitted so in writing.

So, with all three legs pulled out from under her stool, what is left to argue when we ask for the Cause of Death on his Death Certificate to be changed? Nothing. And that's what makes it so easy for me to cite and refute just about every paragraph of Kalamazoo County's filed court response. Like so:

Page 1.

Heller made explicit that the relief she seeks from the courts is: 1. Enter an Order finding that the conclusion of suicide made by Joyce L. deJong was the great weight of the evidence;

As a longtime humorist/satirist in good standing, I must resist the temptation to simply rebut this with, "Monkey Finds Typewriter". Come on, man. That isn't even a fucking sentence. There are obviously a couple of words missing there - it's just sloppy work and is indicative of the overall lack of due diligence that Defendant deJong has brought to this entire sad chapter in Michigan's legal history.

I'm sorry, but that monkey is going to have to retype this before it can even be said to make any sense.

Now, on to Page 1.

There is no claim of tortious or unlawful conduct by the Defendants-Appellees. Rather, Heller simply demands that the Medical Examiner's "manner of death" classification be changed by the court.

"Tortious" is an adjective, it means, "of the nature of or pertaining to a tort." Okay. A "tort" is a "wrongful act, a breach of contract or trust, that results in an injury to another's person, property or reputation." To classify a child's death as a suicide, when no conclusive evidence supports that, smear's our family name. It publicly convicts the child of a crime, of self-murder, without due process. It is hurtful and not at all in line with the guidelines issued by the federal government to Medical Examiners where treatment of grieving families is concerned. Ergo, tortious.

We have said this the whole time. Heller simply demands nothing so much as deJong refuses to admit that she is wrong. Digging in like a mule is "tortious" on its ugly face. It's also capricious and arbitrary, which Theresa argued to the court's deaf ears.

Page 3.

Plaintiff-Appellant Heller now seeks further appellate review in this court. Notably, she seeks to argue the "contested case" issue and a "weight of the evidence" issue that she never briefed in the Court of Appeals.

Incorrect. The Court of Appeals, like the lower court, did not address any of the Exhibits filed along with Theresa's appeal. The Exhibits included a stack of letters, which went unread by the M.E. for months after delivery, all attesting to Charlie's nature. They also included the Kalamazoo County Corporations Counsel's email, offering to change the Cause of Death to Indeterminate if only she and I (!) would both give up our Constitutional rights to free speech. They also included dozens of emails sent back and forth between deJong and her employers that demonstrate her capricious and arbitrary (if not authoritarian) bent. They also included a fraudulent "comparison" report that deJong would have the courts believe substantiates her decision in our case, a "comparison" that is only relevant in that Charlie was a boy, and so was the boy in the other case. The similarities begin and end there.

"Far afield" is what they call that. At least that's what David Ferris called it when deJong bore false witness against the man, got him thrown in jail up in Cadillac. She hides behind the veil of immunity while doing the wrong thing, time after time. It is the story of Joyce deJong's life.

Theresa's attorney was, in fact, cut off in mid-sentence at the Court of Appeals, not allowed to present the evidence, which indeed has great weight. And they know it.

Page 5.

Plaintiff-Appellant Heller has no factual or legal basis under that Act or otherwise to claim that the lower courts erred by dismissing of her "appeal" against Medical Examiner deJong's "manner of death" classification. Because Heller's application effectively asks this court to re-write the clear and unambiguous terms of the statute, she cannot properly invoke any of the "grounds" recognized by MCR 7.305(B).

No, Mr. High Dollar Attorney, all my sister is asking you to do is check a box on a government form, which wouldn't cost the taxpayers anything. 
Anyway, read that again, especially the last sentence:

"Because (she) effectively asks the court to blah-blah-blah, she cannot properly invoke any of the blah blah blah." She doesn't ask the court to do any such thing; that is a characterization made by an attorney, not a fact. To represent that a characterization is a cause of action to support their claim is just... gobbledegook. It further demonstrates that the County, in the matter of defending their poor excuse for a Medical Examiner, is being capricious and arbitrary. An issue we raised before being interrupted. An issue the Defendant never had to address because the Court of Appeals did not ask a single question of their attorney. Not one.

It also happens to be snide and cruel, which is clearly what any citizen who has any dispute with any County official about anything can expect. It's how we roll here - the real Kalamazoo Promise.

There is so much rotten meat in this Answer that I would not ask you, Dear Reader, to digest it all. Let's wrap it up and skip ahead to Page 11.

No record was developed with regard to the "evidence" for Dr. deJong's manner of death classification. Even assuming any appellate jurisdiction could be found to exist, there is nothing for this Court to review in that regard.

If only that were true. We provided (published) statistics that prove that the chances of a boy Charlie's age and in his life circumstances killing himself in broad daylight in his front yard were - ready? - one-fourth of one-half of one-third of one-thousandth of one percent. The letters from friends, family members and his physician bore that out. But deJong didn't care about things like arithmetic and language any more than she cared about following her own Code of Conduct.

So we tried physics; our attorney had a meeting with deJong that also included attorneys representing her, Thom Canny and Paul Hudson. Our attorney presented a model of the horribly unfortunate event that cost Charlie his life to show them that it was much more likely to be an accident than anything else. It was after that meeting that deJong offered to trade "Indeterminate" for "Shut Your Mouths", a coercive and cynical offer that was glossed over by the Court of Appeals.

That's what the "evidence" is. But you can't tell that to the smarmy attorney representing Kalamazoo County and its rogue Medical Examiner in this case - all you'll get is, "he throws everything at the wall to see what sticks." That's in quotation marks because THAT'S WHAT HE ARGUED in the lower court case. And the puppet judge bobbed his head. (He has it in for my sister because of another case.)

Belittling and demeaning and discounting a grieving family's presentation of evidence in their appeal to right the wrongs perpetrated by serial error Joyce deJong is... What is it? Anybody? Ah? Capricious and arbitrary. Which we argue to this day.

I've no faith, people. The powers that be don't answer to the citizen. They just don't.

Not here.

pH 7.24.19

Sunday, June 30, 2019

"First, Do No Harm."

"Where would you be?" I asked my sister, Charlie's Mom.

The question occurred to me as we were going over our appeal to the Michigan Supreme Court in the Heller v deJong case (COA No. 345164).

"Where would you be today, mentally and physically, if you hadn't started investigating this whole thing? If you just never discovered, and therefore just never knew, any of this shit?"

She answered, but her answer didn't match the question enough.

"What if Joyce had checked the box that said 'Indeterminate'? Or, when you first called them the week after it happened, what if they had said, yeah, you're right, we'll change it. What would have happened then? You would have never found out about the pedophile mortician. You would have never been sued. You would have never had to go through any of this."

She thought about this, and said, "I wouldn't be disabled."

I said, "Yep."


The proof is in the pudding of government paperwork, starting with the Death Certificate. Dr. Joyce deJong is the blue-gloved Medical Examiner for Kalamazoo County (and a bunch of others), who is also the Chief Forensic Pathologist for the Homer Stryker M.D. School of Medicine, also known as WMed, which is housed and held by Western Michigan University.

Despite all of that responsibility, she officially stated that the Cause of Death in my nephew's tragic passing was 'Suicide'. She made this determination without the benefit of having read the police reports, without the benefit of having seen the toxicology results, without the benefit of having spoken to a single person who knew Charlie.

She made that determination in less than two days - actually, in less than 48 hours after Charlie was pronounced dead. It's right there on the Certificate: July 28, 2015.

It is not possible to have made that determination without all of  the aforementioned information. There were no witnesses to what happened. There was no note. There was nothing on which to base that determination, and plenty to contradict it.

My sister raised these issues. The Queen of her own Fiefdom, deJong took offense to someone saying she was wrong. She's never wrong. So she engaged in a shamefully shocking Kabuki dance with my sister, teasing this offer and that, all the while never intending to change it (as her own emails prove). So obstinate and pig-headed was deJong, a public servant, that my sister was compelled to file a lawsuit in order to get the Death Certificate changed.

The lower court was useless, as it tends to be. The judge in the case, the outgoing Alexander C. Lipsey, had already thrown unfavorable rulings at my sister in the defamation lawsuit that was brought against her, me, and Charlie's Dad by the Redmond Funeral Home for defamation, harassment, stalking, invasion of privacy, a bunch of other crap.

This occurred because Theresa, in the course of finding out what the Medical Examiner did and why (because deJong doesn't answer to mere citizens like her) discovered some extremely disturbing facts about the individual who picked up her son's remains from the Medical Examiner's Office. Her posting about the horrific things she had learned, in order to warn the public, got us sued. It's public info, per case No. 17-0364-NO in Kalamazoo County's Ninth Circus Court - excuse me, Circuit Court.

So of course the same judge who ruled against her in that case, who placed her under a LIFETIME GAG ORDER, wasn't going to help her in her administrative appeal. No, the mumbling Lipsey did exactly the opposite. He told the County's trial lawyer, some expensive-looking bald guy from Grand Rapids, to simply file a motion to dismiss the case. So he did. And the judge dismissed it.

What does he care? He's too old to run for re-election at the end of his term. We limit that kind of thing in Michigan, the age of judges. They can't take the bench after they're 70 years old. There's a very good reason for that. It needs to be moved up to 65, in my opinion.

So Tipsy Lipsey rules against us, fine. Expected, even. We appeal it. The Court of Appeals backs up the lower court without examining any of the evidence. They cut our lawyer off in mid-sentence and made him stop presenting the argument. Blatantly. The other lawyer, a pregnant Millennial this time, says nothing more than, "We stand by our brief." And they win.

In case it missed you: Welcome to Michigan.

On the way back home from the hearing, after getting broadsided by the appellate court, we got T-boned by a van on the US 131 Business Loop. Totalled the car. If Defendant deJong hadn't compelled us to be in court that day, where would we have been?

A few days later, my sister got sick. When they looked at her, they said that high blood pressure from the stress had created two potentially deadly aneurysms in her brain. May have been exacerbated by the 40,000 lbs of force applied to our vehicle in the accident (her side got hit).

They did an angiogram. Surgery is scheduled.


So... Where would she be?

"I'd be healed," she said. "I would have gone on with my charity, I would have kept working, I would have..." She trailed off.


Above all else, Medical Examiners are supposed to have respect and concern and care for the loved ones of the deceased. Joyce deJong gave my family nothing but scorn, contempt and arrogance.

That's why it's going to the Supreme Court. So the County of Kalamazoo can spend more of my taxpayer dollars defending themselves against my sister.

All they had to do was check a box. But because they won't, my sister is now only a few heartbeats away from being in one. Where could she be instead?

I've said it before on this blog, and I'm saying it again, about my hometown: Don't come here. Don't spend your money here. Don't buy or rent a home here. Don't go to school here. Don't take a job here.

And, if you love your children as much as Theresa loved Charlie, you damn sure shouldn't try to raise them here.

pH 6.3o.19


Friday, May 17, 2019

The Stress was Too Much

We often wondered if the stress would kill Theresa. If she might literally die of a broken heart after the loss of her young son... Close. She is in a hospital on the other side of the state. So if she dies the local Medical Examiner, Joyce "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong" deJong, won't get to do to her what she did to Charlie.

It is too much. My sister's antagonists, the ones who have the power to simply not torment her, will not stop until she is dead, obviously. Isn't that what monsters do?

This Penny Dreadful is brought to you by:

Kalamazoo County Corporations Counsel Elizabeth White and her predecessors Amber Beebe and Thom Canny. They treated my sibling like a pest and not a citizen whose taxes provide the silk pillows upon which these pigs have been carried throughout their illustrious "careers".

Medical Examiner Joyce deJong and her pit bull, JoAnn Catania, who violated practically every word of their own code of conduct in being so stupid and cruel to a grieving mother, whose frantic, frightened attempts at CPR failed to bring Charlie back. They were wrong, they knew it, and they made her take them to court anyway.

WMed Stryker School of Medicine, and its host campus Western Michigan University - her alma mater for fuck's sake - which gives WMed aid and cover and employs this coven of witches, knowing all along what they've done.

A former neighborhood kid named Ellery, who claims to have filmed my nephew's hanging death as part of some sick, twisted, grotesque "challenge", and further claims to have posted such a video online. I published her texts. We called the police; they don't care.

Those are the conspirators in the killing of my sister. If they achieve their goals Theresa will be reunited with her dear son Charlie in the only way that she ever can be.

There will be surgery. Double aneurysm. Again, lucky for her, she's out Detroit way. In a big hospital that isn't staffed by the 'C' students of the world, which is what you'll find in Kalamazoo on a good day.

Coming home from the Court of Appeals two weeks ago, from dealing with the coroner's endless bullshit, we got T-boned by a van. Maybe the force of the collision, which totalled both vehicles, was causative... But so is the stress. And it needn't be.

Tired of writing about it.

I'm not going to update this blog anymore, so you will never know the outcome, which you can guess because it's the same old story every time here... Yeah. I'm going dark.

Monday, April 8, 2019

Far, Far Away

Well, here we all are, Dear Readers, my cousins of the world. Entrenched. Really, it's a miracle we got this far. Right up until the point where I started blogging about my nephew's non-suicide, my sister had been bandied about from the Medical Examiner's Office to county officials to blah blah blah. We have the email chains to prove it. Joyce deJong - aka Morticia, if I can still say that - literally typed, "her lawyer can talk to our lawyer, and we are DONE."

They weren't done. As soon as the pressure was applied, they started making silly mistakes. And committing allegedly nefarious acts. And spending money to defend themselves against the issue. Colluding with those who sued us. Calling the cops. That's all scary stuff, meant to be so, which is how they would (s)tamp down any mere person who had the temerity to stand up to them.

Everyone knows what's going on here. The court system knows. The media knows. You know - and it wasn't heat from me that brought out their spikes, but from you, the eyeballs that see what I am saying here. As soon as their pissy sheets were hung out for the world to see, it was like Holy Water, Batman, people know the truth.

Not many citizens would take on such a leviathan opponent. It's not just a heavy lift; powerful entities like these ones have no doubt that they can crush any little challenger, whether they have legal representation or not. Why would they ever think otherwise? They own the world after all...

Unless you've ever taken any courses in Government, or Political Science, or Journalism, or History, even Shakespeare. Then you know what I know, that any tree can be chopped down by a single ax. In fact,  just about every tree that ever lived has been. I use metaphors like that one at my own risk, actually. Now they'll say I'm a potential lumberjack (Paul Bunyan perhaps), or worse.

Do you know why I have this unshakable belief in the power of the individual in society? Do you want to know? Not because of my education or my work, Lord, no. It's this:

When I was a little kid, my parents took me to see a movie where, at the end, a single pilot in an X-wing fighter blew up the Death Star. So I've seen it done, okay? Moreover, they made a video arcade game based on the movie, basically a Death Star Flight Simulator, and I myself have flown in an X-wing fighter and blown up the Death Star... Many times.

Now, watch, as petty as the Medical Examiner's Office has been, they'll rat me out to George Lucas and claim that I've just committed a copyright violation, or some other Mickey Mouse shit like that. Nothing would surprise me by this time.

Even WMed, the quasi-private school that houses this Little Shop of Horrors, has disabled comments on all of their YouTube videos. They want you to see the outer epidermal layer, not the shitty truth about them, which you will ONLY find in this space.

Stay tuned. The appeal hearing is scheduled for May 2nd. That's two days before Star Wars Day, May the 4th, which is coming right up... May the 4th be with you.

pH 4.o8.19


Thursday, December 20, 2018

🎈Happy Birthday to Me🎈

There are a lot of social and familial quirks that go along with being born on the 20th of December. At least I think so, and it's my birthday, so I can indulge myself even if no one else will indulge me.

For starters, I was born six weeks early. I guess I really needed to be a Sagittarius, goes one stock birthday line. I weighed just about four pounds is all, but I've gained weight since then (see, there's another one).

December 20th is the Winter Solstice, so my Mom isn't kidding when she says that was one of the longest nights of her life (Ding!). And it saves everyone else money, being so close to Christmas, as they can just get me one present for both occasions. (See? We can do this all day.)

My birthday present to myself today is to skip the court hearing for my sister. Yeah, she's STILL being sued by Martha Redmond, owner of the Redmond Funeral Home, who performed her boy's funeral services and got paid over $8,000 for it. All over Facebook posts. Unbelievable.

The court here allows it all to go on, just as it has done with the case versus the shockingly narcissistic Medical Examiner, the one who so coldly and remorselessly botched Charlie's death certificate. The two cases are even connected, as Joyce deJong's department at WMed (Pathology) was found to have faxed certain information to Redmond that the latter testified falsely about under oath, a discovery that resulted in Birthday Boy's dismissal with prejudice. (Touchdown, Heller!)

That's right, conspiracy and perjury, baked in a pie. All on the public dime, and a matter of public record. (For you nosey lawyers out there, confer Case No. 17-0364-NO, Kalamazoo County.)

I reveal all of this at my own peril, of course, since the last time I published something Joyce didn't like, a criminal complaint was made against me by Kalamazoo County Corporations Counsel Elizabeth White. Threatening, she alleged. Yes, really.

I can write more about all that stuff later. For your benefit, Dear Reader. You know. The same handful of you who keep showing up every morning, to see if anything is there.

Christmas, maybe. Or New Year's, perhaps. Meanwhile...

Happy Birthday to Me.

pH 12.2o.18


Wednesday, September 19, 2018

O'Brien for Senate - NOT!

It came in the mail - this time of year, it tends to. You know the type. Very slick. 100-lb gloss cover stock. Four-color process. Eight and a half by eleven. Full bleed on all sides: "Vote for Dunderhead."

If our state Senators would set aside half as much money for the poor as they do for their own re-election campaigns we wouldn't have homeless people camping in Kalamazoo's Bronson Park.

Or did we lock them all up last night? I didn't watch the news.

My state Senator is Margaret O'Brien. But I'd really rather have somebody else. Why? Because she didn't help the most vulnerable (if not the most valuable) of her constituents - not the campers. The Hellers.

After my 12-year old nephew Charlie died in a tragic accident while playing in the maple tree in his front yard in July, 2015, County Medical Examiner Joyce deJong chose (this was entirely of her own choosing) to conduct a full post mortem autopsy, including brain sectioning, including removing the fluid from his eyeballs, including dissecting his neck all the way "to the mandible". Gross, in every sense of the word.

We didn't want, authorize or appreciate any such thing, which we view as unnecessary mutilation done for the purpose of collecting money from the County, which has no problem giving it to her.

That was more than bad enough, the loss of a child, but was deliberately made worse as deJong (no stranger to controversy or courtrooms) still refuses to change the Cause of Death on Charlie's death certificate from Suicide, despite the fact there is no evidence he intended to do such a thing.

He was a little kid.

He was playing.

In his front yard.

In broad daylight.

In the tree where the tree fort and the play rope had been since he was knee-high to a grasshopper.

The medical examiner's story is pure bullshit. That's what this blog is about.

We contacted Margaret O'Brien's office to find out who has the authority to enact the sort of change we were asking for, since the M.E. didn't exactly follow Miss Manners's advice about what to do when folks say "please".

Margaret O'Brien's office told us that the County Commission had the power to do that. So we asked our County Commissioner, John Taylor. He did not respond at all. Just... silence. He knew better than to run for that seat again, and instead challenged Tim Snow for County Clerk, and lost. He was just about the only Democrat in 2016 who failed to win in this deep blue county, this shit hole, this Kalamazoo.

We contacted the next Commissioner for our district, Tracy Hall, and that person engaged in a kabuki dance with the County Corporations Counsel and my sister's estimable attorney. Time passed, nothing happened, and I encourage you to vote against her, too. Another Commissioner was also contacted, but did not advocate on our behalf to the other 10 Commissioners (total combined annual salary: $132,000).

Of course not; why, the County Commission, despite knowing all of this, just appointed the incompetent deJong to a new four-year term as M.E. We already know which side of their butter has the bread on it.

With the Commission being a pointless endeavor, we went ahead and filed an administrative appeal of the Medical Examiner's decision. We filed it in the 9th Circuit Court in Kalamazoo County, which is the jurisdiction we were directed to by our state Senator, Margaret O'Brien. The pro-tem judge in our case, Alexander C. Lipsey, sided with his employer (Kalamazoo County). Surprise, surprise. He has a tendency - at least from the cases I've sat through - to side with the monied interest, which is odd for a purported Democrat.

Do you see the sort of superconductor of stupidity we are faced with in our own government, a Stuporconductor, if you will? They tax us, they use our tax money to defend themselves against us in court, use more of our tax money to hear the case, and they rule against us anyway... I might as well get a County job, put a nice little bow on the whole stupid thing.

One might be more disappointed in such behavior from our elected ingrates if it didn't come across as being routine. And rehearsed.

So when I get this slick, glossy, colorful, full-size mailer coming from the person who has taken our money but not provided a service, that being representation, it makes me want to throw up.

The way the scent of formaldehyde does.

Margaret's mailer is both disgusting and cynical, as she tries to piggyback her own fortunes onto those of the brave survivors of yet another sickening Michigan monster that everyone pretended not to see, Larry Nassar. (Ah, Michigan... So many.)

Senator O'Brien is now apparently taking credit for having "listened and is leading the fight for justice"... Not for us, though.

Senator O'Brien is saying she wants to "ensure the accused are brought to justice". There's that word again. It was Shakespeare who wrote, "Words are easy, like the wind."

Senator O'Brien closes her argument by telling you (not asking you) to "Thank Margaret O'Brien for fighting for justice by visiting [REDACTED].com".

Well, no thanks, because when we asked her for help, she didn't really do anything for us. Possibly because we didn't donate any money to her campaign. You know. Keep those presses rolling.

If you want representation, as a citizen, you'll need to vote for whoever is running against Margaret O'Brien. I don't know or care who that is.

pH 9.19.18


UPDATE: She lost to Sean McCann, who, incidentally, received a $750 campaign contribution from Kalamazoo County Circuit Court Judge Alexander C. Lipsey, who has ruled against my sister in two separate court cases having to do with her son's tragic passing. O'Brien landed on her feet, as the GOP hired her to be the "Secretary of the Senate"... Tough life.

Monday, September 17, 2018

Untitled (or: Fall)

Yea, brother, the nights are getting cooler. The leaves are turning color. The school bus rumbles by in the morning now. Summer is leaving us behind, with Winter waiting patiently.

It's all right.

Seasons change...

Everything does.

pH 9.17.18